


Enneagram

by TheDeviantSentByJericho



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Character Study, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Episode: Putting Others First - Selfishness v. Selflessness Redux | Sanders Sides, Songfic, Sort of? - Freeform, Sympathetic Sides (Sanders Sides)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:34:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27622136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDeviantSentByJericho/pseuds/TheDeviantSentByJericho
Summary: A character study/oneshot series based upon the Enneagram personality system.The summary got too long for the summary box, so it can be found in the beginning notes.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	1. Janus.

**Author's Note:**

> One.
> 
> Janus is sure. He knows what to do and what to say, and most importantly, he knows where to put his attention.  
> So what about when he's wrong?
> 
> Two. 
> 
> Patton is a good person. He is kind, and he puts his famILY above all else.  
> But sometimes, to do the right thing, you need to keep yourself in mind.
> 
> Three.
> 
> Roman is passionate. He's a good creator, a good friend, hard-working and strong-willed.  
> Taking time to rest can be harder than it sounds.
> 
> Four.
> 
> Dr Picani is good at what he does, if he does say so himself. He's understanding, compassionate, knowledgeable.  
> But just because you know how to help others doesn't mean you know how to help yourself.
> 
> Five.
> 
> Logan is logical. It's in his name, in his badge, in his title. He is smart, analytical, observant.  
> Emotions are more logical than he'd like to admit.
> 
> Six.
> 
> Virgil is brave. He's observant, good at picking up on patterns. And while he can be a little hard on himself and others, and while he can read a bit too far into things, he's getting better.  
> But the worst part about hyper-vigilance is when you're right.
> 
> Seven.
> 
> Remy is independent. He prefers life lively, sassy, adventurous, and with more than a little coffee.  
> Sometimes, you need to slow down.
> 
> Eight. 
> 
> Remus is strong. He may not seem it, but he's firm and strong-willed, and he will not be hurt.  
> Not again.
> 
> Nine.
> 
> Thomas is the sum of all the sides. He's everything they are, good and bad, light and dark, and everything in between.  
> That raises the question: who is he?

There is a way.

There is _always_ a way.

Janus knows this, he **knows** he knows it. 

So why can't he find it?

Deceit smacked his fist into a wall, frustrated. Books were strewed about the room, yellow forked silk bookmarks every few pages, highlights covering the text, curving handwriting filling the margins. He found nothing, _nothing_ to explain this!

He had been right! They had _proved_ him right! And yet they had insisted on going on with their stupid, selfless plan! 

And it had worked.

The wedding had paid off.

But not before it had seemed like he was right. Not before they'd seen the consequences of ignoring him.

And yet... that moment. That event... It hadn't been enjoyable. Not in any way.

He hadn't _liked_ seeing Roman cry, or shattering Patton's entire self-worth and image, or leaving Logan feeling ignored, unwanted, abandoned.

He hadn't liked seeing Thomas hurt. Nor any of the other Sides.

But it was worth it, wasn't it?

After all, they had seen. In the end. They understood, at last.

Thomas had even decided to trust him, _him_.

And then he was wrong.

Janus was wrong.

All that pain... only for him to be wrong.

How could he be wrong?

He didn't know what to do.

If he couldn't be right, if he couldn't help, what point was there in him at all?

"Janus?"

The yellow side looked up, stood, brushed himself off, attempted to make himself seem perfect again as he guessed who it was at his door.

Not Remus. Remus would never knock, much less refer to him- or anyone, for that matter- so politely.

Virgil?

No. As much as he missed him, Janus knew Virgil wouldn't visit him. He wouldn't know what to say if he did. 

No, it couldn't be Virgil. They'd torn themselves far too far apart for that, for better or for worse.

Orange? 

That thought was banished as quickly as it was had.

Janus frowned. If it wasn't the dark sides, who could it possibly be? None of the Lights or even Neutrals seemed to want to even acknowledge his existence, even when they could, and the latest videos really hadn't helped that. His non-snake side winced.

"Janus?" the voice came again. "Are you in there?"

It was a soft voice, kind, sweet, gentle. Patton.

Why would Patton of all Sides be _here?_

" **Don't** come in, my dear Morality." An existential crisis was no reason to forget one's manners, after all. Besides, perhaps Patton would be able to offer some assistance.

The door creaked open. Grey peeked through the gap first, and the rest of Patton followed the onesie-covered sleeves into the yellow side's room. "Hey, buddy?"

Janus raised an eyebrow. 

Patton deflated, and the cyan side rubbed his head. "I just. Um. About the video."

"Ah. Yes. Why don't you sit down, and make sure **not** to close the door behind you?" Janus patted the couch and reclined himself. The cyan side hurried to do so, though he seemed rather uncomftorable. "Thanks?"

Janus' eyebrow lifted again. "There is **absolutely** a need for you to thank me."

Patton almost smiled, just a little, but it was gone before you blinked.

"Janus, I... I wanted to... Well, I wanted to apologize."

Genuine shock filled Deceit's core. "Apologize? To me?"

"Well, to everyone really! But to you especially. I... I wasn't a very good father figment, I know."

"Patton, whatever we may be or become, I truly doubt a father-son relationship is in the cards for us. Try Virgil, for that one."

A sad smile.

"You're right. I'm not really anyone's dad, no matter how much I may want to be, in some cases. I just... I don't know what to say."

"I've **never** felt like that."

Patton seemed surprised.

"You have?"

A nod.

"Oh."

There was a silence, but not a long one.  
Not comfortorable, but not _not_ comftorable either.

A needed silence.

"You know, you were right." 

It didn't feel like Patton had broken the silence. He'd filled it, with the words that needed to be said.

"I believe that it was you who was correct in that, my dear."

"No, no- everything you said. About how I was holding on too tight. And trying to sacrifice Thomas for the greater good. You were right."

Janus considered. Before, he would have agreed. Of _course_ he was right. He was always right.

But now...

Self-preservation stayed silent.

"I would like to say I was," he admitted. "But I was wrong in the end. Does that not invalidate the entire argument?"

Patton seemed to consider for a minute. "Well, I'm no Logan. But I don't think so. Your argument fit the evidence available and it um. It was right? Even if your conclusion was wrong, we can still learn from your perspective!"

"Thank you, Patton." There was more he wanted to say, but he refused to let it out. He wouldn't know what to say anyway.

Janus should have known better than to try and hide from the centre of emotional intelligence. "What is it, Dec- Janus? Can I help?"

"No, thank you." the other Side looked at him. "Oh, well, I suppose you can **'t**. Maybe."

"You see, Patton, I... All I ever wanted to do was assist Thomas. Assist you. I thought that if I was perfect, if I was clever, if I was flexible and cautious and _right,_ it would keep us safe. It would help Thomas become the best person he could be. And at first I kept to the shadows. He didn't want me. That was fine. It made it easier, in fact. When the wedding-callback fiasco happened, I thought that it would be my big chance. To show him, to show _you_ that lying wasn't so bad. That putting yourself first would be the better choice for everyone. And then I was wrong." He closed his eyes, looked down.

Patton shifted slightly in his seat. "Well, I think I see the problem! You see, we _did_ learn from you. You _were_ right! I just. Was also?"

Janus looked up again, both sides of his face exposed to the light. "Oh?"

"There's a balance here. You taught me that! You said that I was overdoing it, and you were right. And maybe you were wrong about the wedding. But you know what? That's okay! 

"It's okay to be wrong sometimes."

Janus considered for a moment, and a slight smile spread over his features, human and snake alike.

"You know, Morality? I think you may be right."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ONE ~ THE REFORMER
> 
> The Rational, Idealistic Type: Principled, Purposeful, Self-Controlled, and Perfectionistic.
> 
> _I... I wanna sing a song worth singing  
>  I'll write an anthem worth repeating  
> I... I wanna feel the transformation  
> A melody of reformation_


	2. Patton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tws for self-hate and food mention.

Patton was baking.

It was what he did, what he knew _how_ to do, even if things didn't come out well every time. That was fine.

He was fine.

Patton didn't even realize his hands were shaking until another set gently wrapped around his, stilling the motion, preventing the emotional side from dropping the shells in the batter instead of the eggs. He glanced up, forcing a smile across his features. "Oh, hey Roman! What can I do for you?"

Roman raised an eyebrow and tugged Patton lightly away from the kitchen, sitting him firmly down at the table. "My dear Pat, I do believe the real question is what _I_ may do for _you_. You don't seem the most, ah, _peppy_ today. Was it that snake again?"

Patton carefully placed the ruined egg on a plate. "Oh, there's no need for that kiddo, though the care is appreciated! It's no big **dill**. No need to worry about little old me!"

The other side raised an eyebrow at the pun, then sobered.

"Patton, do not be afraid, I assure you I _will_ fight anyone who has made you feel down, there's no need to protect them."

"It's **thyme** I promise! Even if they _did_ do something- which they didn't- I wouldn't want you to go putting yourself in danger for my sake."

"If you say so Patton, but in that case, what is the issue?"

"There's no issue, I'm fine!"

"I do not need Deceit around to tell me that _that_ is a lie."

"Roman, kiddo, it's okay. If there isn't anything you need, I really should get back to making dinner-"

"I see," said Roman, tapping his chin, a surprisingly analytical expression on his face.

"See what?" blinked Patton.

"See the problem." Pointing directly in Patton's face, Roman called him out. "I _loathe_ to admit it, but Janus was right. You think that taking care of _us_ is more important than yourself. You are _struggling_ , Patton. That's alright! We want to help you, just as you've helped us!"

Morality looked away before his eyes could spill the tears that were rising. "Roman, it's appreciated, but it's an _honour_ to take care of you guys! You're my famILY!"

"As that may be, it does not mean you cannot take care of yourself, or allow us to take care of you!"

The cyan side's shoulders trembled. "But... I'm not good for anything else! I'm... I'm the heart! I'm Morality! I can't be _selfish_! Helping others is what I'm _for!_ "

Reaching out, Roman took Patton's face in his palm and forced the other side to look at him. "Patton. It's- It's _okay_. Can you hear me? It's okay. You're more than what you can do for others."

Patton sniffled. "C-can I, may I, hug you?"

Warm arms and the scents of ink and cinnamon surrounded Patton immediately. "I'm not... I'm not the best person to say this, I know. But. We love you, ** **PaPa**** tton." Patton giggled wetly at the dad pun. "Your compassion and selflessness is so amazing and we love you for it. But we love you for more than that, too."

"You're wrong," Patton mumbled. "You're the perfect person to say that."

Roman laughed slightly and held him closer.

There was silence, until Patton started pulling away. "I'm sorry-" he started, but Roman covered his lips with his hand. "Hush, compassionate compadre! There is absolutely nothing to be sorry about. Now, shall we finish dinner? I do believe there is time for a movie before the others get down here, if you would be so inclined?"

Patton looked up at Roman and smiled.

"I think I'd like that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWO ~ THE HELPER
> 
> The Caring, Interpersonal Type: Generous, Demonstrative, People-Pleasing, and Possessive
> 
> _I know exactly how the rule goes  
>  Put my mask on first  
> No, I don't want to talk about myself  
> Tell me where it hurts  
> I just want to build you up, build you up  
> 'Til you're good as new  
> And maybe one day, I will get around  
> To fixing myself, too_


End file.
